Saturday, 23 May 2015

With The Change


First of all, can we take a moment to gush about what an amazing and historic day it has been in Ireland ! Irish people are generally very modest and sometimes pessimistic, meaning that we are not going to be patriotic and go on and on about how brilliant our country is, in fact we will probably do the opposite and tell you how it is nothing special and there are better places to be. All can often be true but not today ! I have never seen so many Irish people express their pride and love towards their nationality and I have never felt so proud to be Irish. It's been all over International media, the world has been watching so just in case you've been snoozing under a rock, today it was announced that yesterday, Ireland voted yes for marriage equality meaning that same sex couples have the right to marry each other ! Ireland is the first country on the planet to passed marriage equality by popular vote so it is a huge deal for our country and it does show that thankfully, times and attitudes are truly changing. It was also the biggest turn out for a referendum ever and I really hope that people take something from this and exercise their right to vote again in future referendums and elections.

If the photos didn't tell a story, well my hair's a little different. Y'know, not much, only a semi-permanent colour for the next three months, that's all. My mam dyed my mane for me yesterday after reluctantly agreeing to let me have the colour purple dominate my entire head of hair ! As I did not use bleach, it did turn out a slightly different colour of more wine or pink and my initial reactions of confusion probably worried my mam - sorry, oops - but now, I am so so happy with the results ! It is brighter in some places, such as the frizzy strands at the front of my mane which are naturally blonde and the ends which were bleached until they were dyed over last summer but as a whole and my roots are quite dark anyway so it appears more like a tint on my head ! The whole colour feels right though and it's given me a whole new air of confidence which was quite needed !



So there we go. I'm a very content pink grape head and I've just uploaded my first YouTube video in probably over a month !

Grace x 

Thursday, 21 May 2015

No Colour Day


TX Maxx Leather jacket | Penneys skirt | New Look skirt | Penneys skirt | Tesco boots

So on the first day of my summer holidays, I definitely went all out with the wearing plenty of colour kind of the thing, because wow we are having so much beautiful summer weather ! No, not at all. Ignoring the lack of brightness, one of my favourite ways to put together an outfit is wearing a number of different textures, generally all in the same colour - in this case, black. If you hadn't noticed, this velvet skirt is my baby and kind of go-to piece so it basically goes well with anything and the whole velvet thing going on takes away any plainness. I've also both wanted and needed a lighter jacket for the summertime for god knows how long so I was doing leaps of joy in my head teh other day when my mam came home with a leather jacket ! Besides the fact that my phone won't fit into the tiny pockets, meaning that I am probably going to have to find a handbag at some stage, it is so comfy and goes with everything in my wardrobe, which has resulted in a daily TY hoodie or leather jacket scenario. Option two has won the past two days. It's also not warm enough yet to wear my boots and sparkly shoes without socks so I have forced myself back into tights until the sunshine decides to make an appearance - there was a quick hello this afternoon.

In other news, it is the second day of my summer holidays which were supposed to be an escape route from the week of hell and condemnation but all it's left me in is a complete state of paranoia and boredom. It is an effort to get up in the morning and it's got to stage where my decision to cut practically everyone out for the summer is beginning to bother me as I am doing absolutely nothing both online and offline. On a side note, none of this paragraph is sarcasm or exaggeration and I'm not asking for pity, I just feel that I shouldn't be afraid to be honest on here and I'm not in the state to apologise for being negative !

I'll try be in better spirits whenever next time is,

Grace x 

Tuesday, 19 May 2015

TY #21 : THE LAST TRANSITION YEAR POST EVER !




We haven't done a lot of work in class over the past week and the teachers tell you to 'do your own thing' for the next forty minutes which is all fun and games until none of your friends nor your pens (for the record, they also count as friends.) have turned up to class so you end up beating your high score on Zig Zag twice and sending long paragraphs of text to your mam to explain your boredom. If your friends do show up for class, you end up either bursting the teacher's or your own eardrum and that's an entirely different story altogether.

Outside of class, the final full week was very fun ! TY hoodies came on Tuesday morning and it felt like Christmas - I'm not even exaggerating here, it felt like Santa Claus had came ! Of course, I had 'unicorn queen' on the back of mine as I really couldn't think of anything else that was in any way creative and all my friends had brilliant names for their hoodies so I was like "I'M DOING THIS ! BE GRAND !" Fast-forward to Friday, a brilliant day not because it was the weekend, but because we were going to a restaurant for a Japanese buffet ! The food was so beautiful, I don't think any meal out could match it and bar the sushi which I unfortunately did not enjoy stuffing in, I adored everything we ate - including the ice cream which we ate with chopsticks for our challenge ! Afterwards, we returned to school for lunch break where a friendship week event was taking place in the quad and everyone looked so happy with their face paint on, getting in photos with their friends - all for a lollipop of course - it was lovely to watch !

I know I've included a lot of events that have taken place outside of school in my portfolio, but I do think it's important to cover all aspects of how Transition Year has changed me, as in the way that I'm more confident in social situations and have met so many amazing people, one of whom is Nina who is only here for six months and returns to Austria next week. She was really brightened up everyone's year so on Saturday we had a surprise farewell party for her and seeing her reaction to the whole surprise was the best, it was brilliant to see everything go to plan ! 

So this evening, we finish up for the summer ! Really though, I don't find myself in anyway upset that Transition Year is coming to an end, which is strange since I generally tend to become very easily emotional over these things ! I think though this is because I look back over the year and genuinely wish to change nothing and feel that I have acclomplished all my goals I never thought I'd achieve and also that I've left no blank pages, if we are to be metaphorical here. I'm basically saying, that if I had a TY bucket list, there would be a strange event where everything was ticked off and because of that I feel that I'm settled now with the year since I know that there is no more I can do !

It's kind of weird that there are going to be parents and teachers reading this in less than a half an hour and I apologise that you'll have to read backwards but I really hope you do enjoy // have enjoyed reading my adventures through Transition Year and I'm also hoping that I haven't been too sarcastic or blunt in my writing ! 

Thanks to everyone who made this year brilliant - teachers or year heads, classmates, etc. ! 

Grace 

Friday, 15 May 2015

Paper Crown Making !


THERE IS NOTHING MORE SATISFYING THAN A PAPER CROWN !

Two years ago, I cut a paper crown out of Rookie Yearbook One and wore it religiously during one of my many short-lived "Imma be a goth" phases - like here - and I've been meaning to make one of my own ever since and this day last week I had lost the group birthday badge as well as having no present for my friend Laura the Gingey Queen so I made her a Birthday Queen hat, which you can see here. In addition to this, I really want to start doing posts on what are DIYs to me but probably Junior Infants art classwork to the rest of you so this is a great place to start and I've also been loving Jacky of Do It For The Irony's #MayMakers series so this is kind of my teeny little contribution to the trend !

Like I said, a DIY to me is probably playschool artwork to the rest of you and these paper crowns are relatively easy to make so I probably shouldn't call this a tutorial but you will need

Paper - any colour, any kind, newspaper, card, it is up to you // Pencil // Colours - markers, watercolours, crayons, any medium really // Scissors // Sellotape

☆ First, you want to work out how much paper you are going to need, depending on how large or small your head is - I'd recommend the length of two A4 sheets of paper landscape, it works for me and it worked for my friend and everyone who tried the crown on !

☆ Next, you're going to draw the 'template' - ooh, fancy wording, yes - for the top on the town with your pencil and then, you're also going to use that pencil for drawing the outline of words on the crown and any doodles or decoration, you get the picture.

☆ For shading everything in, I did the background in watercolour as it created such a cute pastel effect and also, I didn't have to worry about markers drying up or acrylic causing a mess ! After this, I outlined the words in permanent markers and this time, left the centre blank.

☆ Finally I sellotaped the two pieces of paper together, cut out the outline of the crown and sellotaped it all together !

And that is all I did. A* in DIY's to me, please and thank you.

Grace x 

Tuesday, 12 May 2015

Something I'll Never Know


*** This has probably been blogged about an uncountable amount of times but I wrote this like two weeks ago at stupid o' clock in the morning when I was crying a lot so probably blame hormones. I will probably reread this and cringe in a matter of days but hey, it has some truth to it *** 

One of the strangest concepts I'll never understand, is the idea, glory and desire of 'fitting in'.
A few weeks ago during one of the workshops in school, we had the opportunity to write down two anonymous questions each for the class to discuss at the end of the day and of course, I wasn't going to miss the chance to throw shade at half the population so I write down 

Why does everyone care about fitting in 

It ends up being one of the questions read out and I mutter to my friend "That was my question" to which she responds with something along the lines of that she knew, and the whole class are putting forward reasons for wanting to fit in and I'm just here in my head like 'no. I didn't mean wanting to have friends, I mean wanting to fit in. There's a difference.' Or at least in my careless brain there is. 
In my opinion, there is nothing more damaging than the overwhelming desire to fit in. I'm still only sixteen - a teenager - but like basically every adolescent ever, I've wasted so much of my childhood desperately trying to fit in or worse still, to stay in, it's not even worth going into large detail. For some of my primary school years I was far from a saint and now that I look back, I feel I pressurised people to have certain interests in order to stay in a friend circle at lunchtime or made it hard for them to join in anyway. Karma bit me in the butt anyway as it does for everyone, as I spent the latter of my primary school years practically studying book trilogies or pretending to like certain singers in a bid to fit in or not to lose friends. When I got to first year, it got even worse as I didn't fit in anyway so I bought a Blackberry which did more harm than good and fawned over hair dye and Adidas hoodies in the shops - neither of which I bought in the end, thank god. Even now, there are times where I have to give myself a slap on the wrist to wake the heck up because I waste too much time trying to be friends with someone. Moral of this paragraph, every teenager goes through the whole trying to fit in phase since everyone wants to be accepted or to have a shoulder to cry on.

I think the whole concept becomes a problem when it's no longer a phase and eight years later, you're still trying to fit in with the same people who wouldn't accept you at eight and you have a bloody identity crisis because you aren't even you anymore yet still, no one will accept the faux you. 'Wow, that escalated quickly. That's deep, man' you may be thinking but I'm not over-exaggerating here ! So here's a comparison to demonstrate how ridiculous the whole glory around fitting in is 

I'm trying to fit in with these people
I'm trying to be accepted by these people
I'm trying to be asserted by these people 
I'm trying to be loved by these people 

Do any of the above sentences make the slightest amount of logical sense to you ? Do any of the above sentences appear attractive to you ? Do any of the above sentences seem right to you ? They don't to me, anyway.

So, thanks to my shite sensory integration issues, I am one of these people seriously lacking in both social awareness and skills. I rarely feel 100% comfortable around anyone, I am crap at expressing my love and respect for people and most of all, 

I have never felt like I fit in

The last thing could be a general teenager thing, I generally pass it off in my head as that but it's can be quite an unsettling feeling. Every feeling of being part of something is temporary and once that moment is over, bam ! we're back to not feeling an awful lot again. That's not to say I don't 'fit in' to at least one group, because I do, if I think for a split second I know I do, and that is my whole point. Unless I think about it for long enough, an awful, regular habit of mine

I don't care 

Because I do, I'll believe that I don't fit in and that's worse than a feeling ! So I don't let it bother me and it becomes something quite materialistic and a foreign concept that my brain throws up once it enters my head. And through all the times, when my confidence was sky high, when I had no friends, when self esteem didn't exist and when I made a bunch of friends, I guess the correct way to put it is that 

I've never known if I fit in

And people say that it is the fear of the unknown that unsettles us and by god, it does at the best of times, but I like to think that sometimes you are better off not knowing these things because then you're at peace with yourself, the cloud passes over your head without you even noticing and you become strangely okay with the idea of being accepted or not and you don't feel the need to try, it kind of becomes irrelevant almost - unless you practise my brilliant hobby of over-thinking, cue crying at 1am "I WANT TO FIT IN, I DO" okay, Grace, go to bloody sleep. 

This whole post, as always, has gone in a different direction altogether where I begin to ramble so back to my lovely question that my peers did not understand

Why does everyone care about fitting in
 cue me putting on my parent hat as I'm about to say 

BE YOURSELF 

For god sake people, the most talented of performers will tell you that it is difficult to keep up an act and you're not even getting paid real money for this, only invites to the cinema where you don't even watch the film or parties where you get shitfaced or whatever these tribes do so embrace your looks, quirks, interests and so on as the road to high self esteem and confidence won't be as rocky as keeping up an image to impress others because then it's only their self esteem and confidence that you're lifting, not yours. You should have to try hard and make alterations in order to be accepted, love comes naturally, it's an emotion you shouldn't have to seek from people. Wearing my typical-parent-sayings-even-though-I'm-not-a-parent-or-responsible-adult hat again, anyone who doesn't appreciate you for the real you isn't worth sticking around with, let alone changing for ! Friendship, family relationships if you want to add that, any kind of relationship isn't plain sailing - YES, METAPHORS PEOPLE, ISN'T THIS BRILLIANT - and like I always say, there are going to be things about you people don't like and there will be things about people you don't like but that doesn't mean that anyone has to change because at that stage we'll all be A4 lined copies of each other. 

On a final note, if you do get caught in the herd, at least gallop rather than run or spray your wool a different colour, please ! And wear a paper crown, just to disrupt the social hierarchy.

Wow this whole post was so deep and cliche, 

Grace x 

Saturday, 9 May 2015

I Do Actually Wear Colours

Penneys tee | cardigan used to be my mam's | Topshop skirt | Penneys tights | Tesco boots | New Look necklace 
Currently listening to : Love Is To Die | All My Love | The One | Hallelujah

Today was a pretty good day, mainly since the weather was gorgeous compared to the past week or so and I managed to find clothes and makeup (sorry mammy !) and get food out in town before what I would describe as 'peak hour'. Basically the time around 3pm - or 2pm in my friends and I's case - onwards when half the adolescent population of the town and it's surroundings come out in full force and I end up just hiding from everyone. Brownie points if it's Tesco. Especially Tesco, as in the place I'd compare to the water in a desert where the animals go to gather, it's my idea of a nightmare so we avoid that place at all costs. 

So like I said, today was warmer, although still not nice enough to trek out without a jacket so I managed to survive the morning and afternoon by wearing my warm cardigan over the cutest strawberry tee ever which I haven't worn in ages and seriously need to get more use out of this summer ! My burgundy skirt is quite short and made of very light material and again, I'm really not up to catching a cold at this stage of the year so boom ! in come the tights. I generally cannot stand nylon tights as they make feel nauseous, but I've been tolerating them this spring as the summer months approach so that I'm not melting in wool ! Today must have been the day of wearing things that have been neglected for quite a while since I also wore one of my favourite necklaces which has been sitting on my dresser for way too long now and I've been loving the idea of shorter necklaces and chains so it made perfect sense to wear this to finish off the outfit. I really love all these colours - I spend half the time being like YES I WANT TO WEAR BURGUNDY AND GREY AND BROWNS ALL DAY and the other half I sit there staring at Tumblr going K FROM NOW ON I AM WEARING ALL PASTEL BECAUSE KAWAII DESU so you know, it's going to turn out difficult to pair up those colour types since they're kind of the opposite to each other (no shit sherlock, yes I know.) !

In other news, Monday marks the beginning of the last full week of Transition Year and after that we've only the next Monday and Tuesday. Typical thing of me to say, but I'd swear the academic year is going by faster year on year and I still feel that we're only a month or two into TY ! Hopefully, the longer summer holiday will encourage me to blog more and be extra creative with my ideas so here's looking forward to that in another ten days,

Grace x